See, it's better with a dick — masturbation doesn't make sperm come out of your pussy

It's not my fault, it's my husband's. He's always asleep, so I fuck my friend

Yeah, not wearing panties to work is a hint of a bonus, not a fuck

I got it out in time! I swear my sperm jet wasn't inside you

How could I have forgotten about February 14? Okay, I have a pee